October 20th, 2004

Kittens +  Grenade

This is bullshit

No, I am quite sure my current state of fatigue and short breath are not due to depression or stress. I swear, this doctor asked everything except what might possibly be relevant. He asked how I broke my ankle, how long ago I was diagnosed with depression, commented that 200mg is a very high dose of Zoloft, am I under any unusual stress.... Asked about family history, which should have been in my charts that he was looking at...

Some chest-taps and an EKG later, we do not know what's wrong. My lungs aren't congested, my heart looks fine (mind you, thank goodness for that). I'm supposed to go in for blood work tomorrow morning - before having breakfast. Naturally. Blood sugar is gonna be brutal, on top of my current fatigue. I'm honestly not sure how I'll manage.

In the meantime, the fatigue affects my concentration, coordination and balance. I can't go in to work, but I can't AFFORD to miss much more work. I'd manage to get to my desk and pass out.

Most annoying of all, the doctor's final word of the day was I was quite overweight. And handed me a nutritional sheet with Healthy Alternatives, telling me to lose 20lbs. This is fucking bullshit. I am NOT obese. I'm heavy for my height, but I also have a broad-based frame. I've gained weight recently, I know this, and I HAVE been eating more healthfully, plzkthx. I'd be getting more exercise, except I'm still working on rehabbing my ankle, and then fatigue/illness showed up.

This after Brooke told me a few months ago she thought I'd lost weight. Mmhm.

I want a bloody second opinion.
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