Manawolf (manawolf) wrote,

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Stole from ame_chan

Oh. My god. My brain. It's like.... Chick tracts gone horribly, horribly wrong. Some of the material here actually makes me honestly nauseous.

Bolds by me....

God made me an intellectual giant, a spiritual explorer, and an inspired artist. I intend to fully use my mind and my spirit to further God's kingdom. I have a brain, so why should I copy the same old miracles in the Bible that everyone else does? No, I have a better plan!

I want God to do something new for Christianity. Are healings and calling fiery hail down from heaven all that He can do? Thank goodness, no! He would be a boring God indeed! Besides, that's kids' stuff. I want God to perform a miracle that will continually astound people, something that only God can do. I want God to change this awful human body into a beautiful dragon so that people will experience the miraculous every day of their lives.

When God changes me into a dragon, people from all walks of life will admire me and listen to what I have to say for once in my life. Nobody wants to listen to a scared little boy with glasses, but everyone likes dragons. I'll give them a good reason to accept Jesus. They'll get to meet REAL dragons in Heaven, not the make-believe ones in fairy tales that will never be able to interact with them. Jesus will prove to them, through me, that He can satisfy anyone.

Why should satan have a copyright on the dragon image? I'll fight it in a bloody court of law if I have to. The dragon image is PUBLIC DOMAIN and as such I can claim the right to my own interpretation on it. I will be the real dragon, not satan. Satan is just a miserable fallen angel and I will not let that insignificant jerk steal my dreams.

OK the nausea is gone, to be replaced by hysterical laughter. Yeah... you just wait for God to change you into a dragon. I will convert the instant that happens. And no fair going all Stalking-Cat on us either. I want a fucking deific bolt of lightning to transform you into a DRAGON. I want a MIRACLE of physical transformation. Like POOF. If that happens, if you manage this, I will be your gospel BITCH.

Don't let me get started on the public domain versus Satan stuff, it's just... no. Too easy. That's like shooting hog-tied ducks in a barrel.

Moltar Mothra The dude does seem to mean well (for a fundie... apparently he has four Gay Friends...) and I can't fault him for that (the road to hell... intentions...), but he needs to be taken down a notch. Or thirty.

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